i love.

Wow. These past few months have been insane. I haven't been on in forever. It's okay I am still alive. Just dealing with a fair amount of things right now. I needed some time away. Well God has been teaching me a lot. Have you ever noticed we tend to choose the hard way of learning things? We don't see it when God first tries to tell us so it takes Him doing something drastic for us to understand? It's true we are stubborn people. I don't see why we make it sooo difficult. I'm positive it breaks the heart of God. I believe prior to the accident that God was trying to show me some stuff but I was being blind to what He had to say. One thing the Lord really showed me in the healing process after the accident was that I needed to love. I am not sure I will be able to adequately express exactly what I learned. But in case you didn't know I am the type of person that doesn't really trust people or love freely. I don't think that is the heart of God. Jesus has always loved freely so why shouldn't I? In a moments time I could have everything precious to me. I need to not hold back with the people God has placed in my life. But it is soo hard to always remember that and to always give of myself.