Happy Birthday Jesus!! <3
"But the Angel said to them, 'Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger." Luke 2:10-13
Friday, December 25, 2009
Sunday, December 20, 2009
2009 :)
Most of you kinda know what happened to me this year. So I am choosing to sit down and give it all from a new refined perspective. The truth is looking back on the year now everything just seems different.
January-March
Hah where do I begin?? At the very beginning of this year I appeared in Mid Summer Nights Dream and went to my second youth retreat. At the beginning of February my Mom was diagnosed with Diverticulitis, this was hard for me to work through at first. With that came some hard stuff, it revealed the yuck of my heart. Having been in a state of recovery from my depression/suicide attempt, the Lord did something amazing. Having lost everything that was important to me in late 2008 God was pulling me out of that mess. When I lost my group of friends at church and my connection with the church, I chose to leave my church. After talking it through with an adult, it was clear the Lord wanted me to stay put. I didn't know why or really how I was gonna make it but I made a promise to the Lord that night to stay at my home church. This is just a small bit of my testimony. March was an entire month of intense training in both evangelism, the Bible, and witnessing tools.
April-June
In April the Lord took me to San Francisco. A place that to be completely honest, I never thought I'd go. It was an awesome trip of full out missions work. As I poured into the community the Lord blessed me abundantly. I was faithful to the promise I made in February and God was faithful to bless me. He gave me amazing friends again!! Something I really didn't think I was going to gain back that fast and better than that he mended many broken friendships. God did a huge work in my life in San Francisco. I didn't want to leave, but he gave me the strength to trust him and get through it. Upon leaving San Fran I started talking a lot with another student named Evan ;). It was a simple friendship and awesome spiritual talks, just in total awe of what Jesus had just done on the trip. However, God had different plans for that relationship and after about two weeks of talking we realized how much we liked each other. We waited on the Lord and got to know each other for all of May and June. In May I appeared in yet another show.... Bye Bye Birdie and was honored with a lead role for the first time. June was a busy month of fundraisers and hard work for Ireland. It was a month of learning to trust my Jesus all over again, allowing him to be my great provider. As I stressed through some of my biggest payments for Ireland the Lord worked through all of them. At the end of the month I went to the hospital to say goodbye and to minister to my Aunt in her final days of life.
July-September
It was one of the best years of VBS as I saw many incredible things happen. July 29th, I took off on a plane and I went to Ireland. God had totally blessed my trip and paid the way entirely!! I don't know how to summarize those moments in Ireland (amazing how I still can't articulate what the Lord did). Lets just say many life's were changed and mine being one of them. One of the biggest sacrifices I faced going to Ireland was my Aunt. She was quickly fading and I had no idea if she would pass while I was halfway across the world. God blessed that as well and she survived until four days upon my return home. It was more than difficult I couldn't cry and I couldn't respond in a way that made sense. I kept to myself for around two weeks after her death (for heavens sake I was still jet lagged and grieving at the same time). In September just a week before my birthday we had her memorial service. I chose to speak at it something I had no intentions of doing. But I had promised her that day in the hospital that I would tell her family that she had gone home to meet Jesus. I turned sixteen in September and got the greatest birthday present man could give. I was blessed with the news that I am going to be an Aunt in 2010!!
October-December
These past three months have been both trying and amazing. The Lord has put things in my path that I never expected. He has guided me through all of them and I am thankful. My cousin Josh died early October and his passing brought a hard thing to the table after having just lost his mom in September. On October 18th after getting my parents permission, Evan asked me to be his girlfriend. I was so stoked it felt like decades that we had waited on the Lord and prayed (though it had only been six months ;). The Lord has blessed me with amazing grades this semester and I am now preparing to end my first semester of Junior year (crazy huh?). I am grateful for such an amazing year. I am thankful the Lord has pulled me out of the misery and sin of depression. I am thankful he removed the veil of deception and gave me worth in him. I found myself in God this year and for that I am ever grateful. I am thankful that Jesus has blessed my family and friends with good health and taken home the one's who were suffering far to much. I am thankful for another year in the presence of the Lord!
Be Blessed in 2010
Much Love, Ayana <3
January-March
Hah where do I begin?? At the very beginning of this year I appeared in Mid Summer Nights Dream and went to my second youth retreat. At the beginning of February my Mom was diagnosed with Diverticulitis, this was hard for me to work through at first. With that came some hard stuff, it revealed the yuck of my heart. Having been in a state of recovery from my depression/suicide attempt, the Lord did something amazing. Having lost everything that was important to me in late 2008 God was pulling me out of that mess. When I lost my group of friends at church and my connection with the church, I chose to leave my church. After talking it through with an adult, it was clear the Lord wanted me to stay put. I didn't know why or really how I was gonna make it but I made a promise to the Lord that night to stay at my home church. This is just a small bit of my testimony. March was an entire month of intense training in both evangelism, the Bible, and witnessing tools.
April-June
In April the Lord took me to San Francisco. A place that to be completely honest, I never thought I'd go. It was an awesome trip of full out missions work. As I poured into the community the Lord blessed me abundantly. I was faithful to the promise I made in February and God was faithful to bless me. He gave me amazing friends again!! Something I really didn't think I was going to gain back that fast and better than that he mended many broken friendships. God did a huge work in my life in San Francisco. I didn't want to leave, but he gave me the strength to trust him and get through it. Upon leaving San Fran I started talking a lot with another student named Evan ;). It was a simple friendship and awesome spiritual talks, just in total awe of what Jesus had just done on the trip. However, God had different plans for that relationship and after about two weeks of talking we realized how much we liked each other. We waited on the Lord and got to know each other for all of May and June. In May I appeared in yet another show.... Bye Bye Birdie and was honored with a lead role for the first time. June was a busy month of fundraisers and hard work for Ireland. It was a month of learning to trust my Jesus all over again, allowing him to be my great provider. As I stressed through some of my biggest payments for Ireland the Lord worked through all of them. At the end of the month I went to the hospital to say goodbye and to minister to my Aunt in her final days of life.
July-September
It was one of the best years of VBS as I saw many incredible things happen. July 29th, I took off on a plane and I went to Ireland. God had totally blessed my trip and paid the way entirely!! I don't know how to summarize those moments in Ireland (amazing how I still can't articulate what the Lord did). Lets just say many life's were changed and mine being one of them. One of the biggest sacrifices I faced going to Ireland was my Aunt. She was quickly fading and I had no idea if she would pass while I was halfway across the world. God blessed that as well and she survived until four days upon my return home. It was more than difficult I couldn't cry and I couldn't respond in a way that made sense. I kept to myself for around two weeks after her death (for heavens sake I was still jet lagged and grieving at the same time). In September just a week before my birthday we had her memorial service. I chose to speak at it something I had no intentions of doing. But I had promised her that day in the hospital that I would tell her family that she had gone home to meet Jesus. I turned sixteen in September and got the greatest birthday present man could give. I was blessed with the news that I am going to be an Aunt in 2010!!
October-December
These past three months have been both trying and amazing. The Lord has put things in my path that I never expected. He has guided me through all of them and I am thankful. My cousin Josh died early October and his passing brought a hard thing to the table after having just lost his mom in September. On October 18th after getting my parents permission, Evan asked me to be his girlfriend. I was so stoked it felt like decades that we had waited on the Lord and prayed (though it had only been six months ;). The Lord has blessed me with amazing grades this semester and I am now preparing to end my first semester of Junior year (crazy huh?). I am grateful for such an amazing year. I am thankful the Lord has pulled me out of the misery and sin of depression. I am thankful he removed the veil of deception and gave me worth in him. I found myself in God this year and for that I am ever grateful. I am thankful that Jesus has blessed my family and friends with good health and taken home the one's who were suffering far to much. I am thankful for another year in the presence of the Lord!
Be Blessed in 2010
Much Love, Ayana <3
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Plans for 2010
I really don't have any right now. It's just kinda scary. I mean I have two shows lined up and a retreat, but otherwise I am kinda coming up empty there. This time last year I knew what two places I would be going on missions trip, which shows I would be doing, and other important things. It was kinda like I had all of 2009 planned out. Let me just tell you though that many things came my way that was not included in my plan. Donn't get me wrong it was awesome! Those things the little one's that Jesus threw into my plan to make it his, well I learned from those and enjoyed many of them too :). So here I sit, sixteen days away from the new year completely wondering what it is the Lord has for me. I don't have any missions trips lined up and as much as I want to return to Ireland, I am just not sure about that yet. This all brings me to my point. I don't have any big plans for 2010 and even though that's scary/weird, it's pretty exciting. Not knowing where I am going or what I am doing. Knowing that I am going to have to fully trust in the Lord and allow him to be my guidance. 2010 is my last full year living at home. I just kinda want to make the best of it. With all that said, I am simply leaving this all in the hands of my heavenly Father. Praying for Gods guidance and instruction. So it is indeed an exciting time ah ed of me :).
Monday, December 14, 2009
Service
Is it possible to loose sight of the true meaning of servant hood even in the middle of serving. Is it possible to run so fast you forget whose fame your running for? Is it possible to get so into what you're doing you forget who your doing it for? Are we waisting our time serving if no love pours from us? What happens when we run dry on Gods love and no longer now how to give that?? How is it that we become so far removed from Gods will that we can't even see we aren't honoring him anymore? Serving God is not merely external it reaches way deep inside. So deep that it often reveals the intentions and convictions of the inter most being of our heart. When were faced with that choice to love service for the right reasons. For reasons that go beyond our own glory and fame. To loose ourselves in serving is the true meaning of servant hood. And until we are willing to loose everything about ourselves and let go of our desires, being a servant will not come natural. Choosing to not compromise and being willing to listen to the convictions of our heavenly Father. Learning to love others who are hard to love and learning to assume the role of a Godly leader. This becomes a daily sacrifice and one that leads us into eternal servant hood. I pray today that I choose to walk in the path of true servant hood to my Jesus attempting to not stray but stay on that narrow path.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
December!! :)
It's December already. I can't believe it, time is just going by so fast. I'm excited about it being Christmas time though, I just absolutely love it!! I have just been super busy and consumed with rehearsals. I got sick again this week, I suppose it was just that time again. We have had some crazy cold weather unlike most winters lately. I have pretty much enjoyed that except for getting sick from it. My body flips out in extreme cold weather, it's quite comical. Anyways, rehearsals have been crazy and like we only have 3 more before our actual show. Two of which are technical, so that leaves us with one full rehearsal. I am assuming none of this makes sense, so I shall sum it up. My show is fast approaching and that all just scares me :). It's just insane to think it's already here, I have worked so hard on this and in two nights it will be over. It's the joys of acting, you pour time into something and than it's over quickly. Moving on, I got my costume!!! Haven't seen it yet, but I have it (always important to have ;). It is a pretty renaissance dress, that yes I have not seen. Our costume director is getting it for me :). I have been keeping busy by writing a book about my testimony. Don't have to much information on that yet but it has been pretty exciting to write. That is all for now I have tons of make up home work from being sick :(.
Talk to you lovely bloggers soon,
Love Ayana :)
PS: In case you were wondering Evan is doing great!! :)
Talk to you lovely bloggers soon,
Love Ayana :)
PS: In case you were wondering Evan is doing great!! :)
Monday, December 7, 2009
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Genesis and the lessons
I have been reading through the book of Genesis lately and have really enjoyed learning all about the beginning of time. It has been really intense to read through what the Lord has done in the past and kinda just reading history. I really really hate the subject of history in school, but give me biblical and church history and I can't get enough. Anyways, I am only a couple chapters into the book and man have I learned so much. I heard it said before that if you just read Genesis, your entire life will make sense. I hadn't really thought much about it until now, when I am taking the time to reflect on the lessons of Genesis. I must say one of the really cool things is that it has both a lot of rich history as well has the power, love, and fullness of God. I wanted to talk about a couple of things that I have taken note of that really made sense to life in general. So I decided to create a timeline of sorts to display what exactly happened at the beginning of the world and how it makes sense to life today.
Chapter 1: God creates the entire world. He sees that it is good but it is missing something... man
Chapter 2: God creates man, sees that he is good but is still lacking something. He then creates woman.
Chapter 3: So here's where it gets yucky and the most important piece of history vital to understanding life comes in. Man sins, the first ever sin recorded in the Bible. In verse 1 satan questions God's words to the woman, pushing her to question God. Then the next two verses are the scary stage of sin where she begins to contemplate and question. In verse 4 satan hurdles a lie at Eve telling her she will not die if she eats of the fruit. Which we all know very well that it is NOT true. Not even two verses later.... she commits the sin. But let me point out the sin was "desirable" and "delightful", making it true that sin always comes in a pretty package. Then in verse 8 (after Adam sins too) they are forced to hide because they become ashamed in front of the Lord. There you have it my friends, the process of sin. Pretty simple if you ask me. But there is still so much more to grab from this one passage about life. Verse 16 explains childbirth. Verse 18 explains why we have to take care of the ground, why things don't grow supernaturally like they first did. Nothing is anymore how it was planned to be. Animals have begun to eat each other... something that wasn't in the beginning. There was peace on earth. Now man has become a meat eater versus a vegetarian as Jesus planned. Our bodies and the needs of them all changed. Everything changed with one single sin and this is why life is the way it is today. Sin continued with every person that was recorded in the Bible and who wasn't.
I found this all so interesting and thought I would share it with you. It just gives so much wisdom and understanding into life and why it is this way.
Love Ayana <3
Chapter 1: God creates the entire world. He sees that it is good but it is missing something... man
Chapter 2: God creates man, sees that he is good but is still lacking something. He then creates woman.
Chapter 3: So here's where it gets yucky and the most important piece of history vital to understanding life comes in. Man sins, the first ever sin recorded in the Bible. In verse 1 satan questions God's words to the woman, pushing her to question God. Then the next two verses are the scary stage of sin where she begins to contemplate and question. In verse 4 satan hurdles a lie at Eve telling her she will not die if she eats of the fruit. Which we all know very well that it is NOT true. Not even two verses later.... she commits the sin. But let me point out the sin was "desirable" and "delightful", making it true that sin always comes in a pretty package. Then in verse 8 (after Adam sins too) they are forced to hide because they become ashamed in front of the Lord. There you have it my friends, the process of sin. Pretty simple if you ask me. But there is still so much more to grab from this one passage about life. Verse 16 explains childbirth. Verse 18 explains why we have to take care of the ground, why things don't grow supernaturally like they first did. Nothing is anymore how it was planned to be. Animals have begun to eat each other... something that wasn't in the beginning. There was peace on earth. Now man has become a meat eater versus a vegetarian as Jesus planned. Our bodies and the needs of them all changed. Everything changed with one single sin and this is why life is the way it is today. Sin continued with every person that was recorded in the Bible and who wasn't.
I found this all so interesting and thought I would share it with you. It just gives so much wisdom and understanding into life and why it is this way.
Love Ayana <3
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