Watch how you treat others. Sometimes in our anger towards one thing we take it out on someone else pretending we'r angry with them.

"You need to stop comparing yourself to other people, because your always gonna fall short."

A few pics from our time

My sis and bro in law came out to visit this past weekend and we went to the beach for my birthday party. Here are a few pics from the day :)

The drive :)

Gorgeous Day!!!

Our toes.... we have an unspeakable bond :)

On the waterline... I LOVE THIS PIC!!

Me and the sorciglies :)

My "ughhhh" post

So I need to rant for like 5 minutes about how tired I am after drama. I AM ALWAYS TIRED!!! I sleep so long after, it's quite comical. Okay I suppose this rant is done. I just don't enjoy the fact that I'm always tired. Kay I'm done :).
LOVE YOU ALL!!!! <3

SIXTEEN!!!

Yes!! It's true, Today I turned sixteen. I am just as shocked as any of you. I mean, it's not that I didn't think I would make it to 16 it's just I didn't know it could come so fast. So I kinda took a trip down memory lane and thought I'd share it with ya'all!

Baby =P

2nd Birthday

What we did best when we were young... have fun :)

My roller skating days.....hehe

Road Trip to New Mexico

Those girls gave me the best 4 years of my life!!!!!

Washington D.C. with Mitch and Is. man I miss them :)

Graduation Photo's :)

Graduation!!!!

One of my first missions trips :)

My First HS show

My First Dance

Yes that was a tribute to ME :) no im not conceited I just thought it was cool

A long way

Ahh. Yes!! It's already September and yes almost a whole year later. Just a year ago, well just a year ago a lot of things were different. For starters Donna was still here with us and secondly I was a completely different person. Just now I forced myself to read the post "D Update" that was written just a year ago. It goes without saying that these past few months were the "opening up" stage. The stage in the grieving process where I began to actually be able to talk about the entire situation and to begin to use it as a witnessing tool. God has provided some unique opportunities to share my story with other's, but never without a tear. To think that it has been a year since my Mom sat down and had the hard talk with me is just crazy. It was only by God's strength that through the tears she was able to tell me that Donna was going to meet Jesus soon. This past year has been a long, hard, and eventful journey to healing. I am not going to sit here and tell you all that I have completely healed and everything's better. It's simply not true!! I still have those days where I can hear her voice and I cry. There are the moments a song comes on or an inside joke comes to mind. The times I slip into my CM worship shirt and I automatically feel a piece of me is missing. This is true, part of me has gone. Donna played a huge part in my life and therefore she became a part of who I am. Now as I have attempted to adjust to life without her, well much has changed. Once again I don't claim to have totally adjusted!! I still want to run in the office and tell her the latest thing God taught me. We did share those sweet talks about the Lord's work in my life. The funny thing now that I think about it, was that it never was about her. Always me!! She cared so much for me and never bothered to even talk about herself. WOW!!! Anyways, as I read that post I mentioned earlier I felt a sense of conviction. Where went that mentality?? The one that so believed God was completely in control. Does it take a 180 from my dying friend for me to see that??? Why couldn't I just see that by reading the story of Christ's death??? Or the parting of the red sea? I guess I say all this just to prove sometimes we have to "see" and "feel" to understand those things. Now as I face my heart a year after that statement was written, I am forced to remember that He remained in control in Donna's life. So I go out today, with that new mentality!!! SOO SOOO SOOO Meaningful.....
God Is In Control!!

My health-Prayer Request

This is just a quick prayer request regarding my health, I am not sure what's going on. We are hoping to get in sometime next week for me to be weighed again. A few specifics I am loosing weight rapidly and I am always tired. I was already tested for my thyroid and anemia so we really aren't sure. Thank you very much!!
Love Ayana <3

TRUST!!

It has been heavy on my heart to share more about my trip, however I have been dealing with "re-entry" and getting back into the swing of my life. I must share that it hasn't been easy and there have been days over the past three weeks that I wanted nothing more than to be back in Dundalk. Don't get me wrong, I have enjoyed being home. But this is all still weird and seems so pointless. Everyday I miss being with the kids, seeing their smiling face's, teaching them the word of God, and showing them the Love of the Lord!!! So has the Lord refined me through the re-entry?? YES!! He's re-teaching me something vital to my life that he taught me in Ireland, TRUST! Trust was a huge theme from the time I started praying for the trip even until now. Beginning from the first meeting for the trip. I sat there with a paper in my hand that indicated the high amount of money I would need, to be apart of the team. I walked out of there and from that moment on I was in a battle to understand the reality of Trusting my Saviour. It continued to be the theme over the next few months before our trip. The time we had a huge payment due and I literally freaked out, it was through that the Lord taught me or started to teach me to trust. Towards the beginning of July when things started getting worse for my Aunt and I had no idea when I would loose her and how it would affect me. Three weeks before we left and the last of our payment was due.. All of those times...God was teaching me to trust and preparing me for an even bigger trust battle than I had ever fought. We left on July 29th and got to Ireland July 30th (yes I spent the night on a plane ;). There came a point in that 15 hour flight that I became home sick. I was scared in all reality to leave my home for 2 weeks and to know that everything was changing while I was gone. I was terrified to think that I could possibly loose my Aunt while I was gone. God started to show me on the plane the depths of the lack of trust I had in our relationship. Heart breaking, I KNOW!!!! It's not like he didn't call me there, provide the ENTIRE way, and take care of everything. He was clearly asking me why at this point, I hadn't realized he was going to take care of me and that I didn't need to fear. I wrestled with the Lord most of the plane ride, to understand how exactly I was to go about this "trust" thing. The moment we touched down in Ireland I felt this peace, a peace that almost whispered "Your right where I want you now GO, faithfully obey, and have fun!" It was really weird, but cool how God worked through that. Being there was also difficult, but only for the first four days. After those days and after I relearned to trust again, I was okay. Than came the sad part for every team member. We left the kids!!!! Of course we left them changed kids because of Jesus power, but we still miss them. Ohhhhhh, what a huge life lesson I learned once again on the plane ride and through this point in time. God is soooo goood, working so hard to keep me in line ;).