Plans for 2010

I really don't have any right now. It's just kinda scary. I mean I have two shows lined up and a retreat, but otherwise I am kinda coming up empty there. This time last year I knew what two places I would be going on missions trip, which shows I would be doing, and other important things. It was kinda like I had all of 2009 planned out. Let me just tell you though that many things came my way that was not included in my plan. Donn't get me wrong it was awesome! Those things the little one's that Jesus threw into my plan to make it his, well I learned from those and enjoyed many of them too :). So here I sit, sixteen days away from the new year completely wondering what it is the Lord has for me. I don't have any missions trips lined up and as much as I want to return to Ireland, I am just not sure about that yet. This all brings me to my point. I don't have any big plans for 2010 and even though that's scary/weird, it's pretty exciting. Not knowing where I am going or what I am doing. Knowing that I am going to have to fully trust in the Lord and allow him to be my guidance. 2010 is my last full year living at home. I just kinda want to make the best of it. With all that said, I am simply leaving this all in the hands of my heavenly Father. Praying for Gods guidance and instruction. So it is indeed an exciting time ah ed of me :).

Service

Is it possible to loose sight of the true meaning of servant hood even in the middle of serving. Is it possible to run so fast you forget whose fame your running for? Is it possible to get so into what you're doing you forget who your doing it for? Are we waisting our time serving if no love pours from us? What happens when we run dry on Gods love and no longer now how to give that?? How is it that we become so far removed from Gods will that we can't even see we aren't honoring him anymore? Serving God is not merely external it reaches way deep inside. So deep that it often reveals the intentions and convictions of the inter most being of our heart. When were faced with that choice to love service for the right reasons. For reasons that go beyond our own glory and fame. To loose ourselves in serving is the true meaning of servant hood. And until we are willing to loose everything about ourselves and let go of our desires, being a servant will not come natural. Choosing to not compromise and being willing to listen to the convictions of our heavenly Father. Learning to love others who are hard to love and learning to assume the role of a Godly leader. This becomes a daily sacrifice and one that leads us into eternal servant hood. I pray today that I choose to walk in the path of true servant hood to my Jesus attempting to not stray but stay on that narrow path.

December!! :)

It's December already. I can't believe it, time is just going by so fast. I'm excited about it being Christmas time though, I just absolutely love it!! I have just been super busy and consumed with rehearsals. I got sick again this week, I suppose it was just that time again. We have had some crazy cold weather unlike most winters lately. I have pretty much enjoyed that except for getting sick from it. My body flips out in extreme cold weather, it's quite comical. Anyways, rehearsals have been crazy and like we only have 3 more before our actual show. Two of which are technical, so that leaves us with one full rehearsal. I am assuming none of this makes sense, so I shall sum it up. My show is fast approaching and that all just scares me :). It's just insane to think it's already here, I have worked so hard on this and in two nights it will be over. It's the joys of acting, you pour time into something and than it's over quickly. Moving on, I got my costume!!! Haven't seen it yet, but I have it (always important to have ;). It is a pretty renaissance dress, that yes I have not seen. Our costume director is getting it for me :). I have been keeping busy by writing a book about my testimony. Don't have to much information on that yet but it has been pretty exciting to write. That is all for now I have tons of make up home work from being sick :(.
Talk to you lovely bloggers soon,
Love Ayana :)
PS: In case you were wondering Evan is doing great!! :)

Learning to Love like God is the hardest thing! But it molds us more into the image of the one who died for our sins. Isn't that promising!

Thank God for trials and hard stuff. They bring us closer in our relationships. Praise the Lord!!

Genesis and the lessons

I have been reading through the book of Genesis lately and have really enjoyed learning all about the beginning of time. It has been really intense to read through what the Lord has done in the past and kinda just reading history. I really really hate the subject of history in school, but give me biblical and church history and I can't get enough. Anyways, I am only a couple chapters into the book and man have I learned so much. I heard it said before that if you just read Genesis, your entire life will make sense. I hadn't really thought much about it until now, when I am taking the time to reflect on the lessons of Genesis. I must say one of the really cool things is that it has both a lot of rich history as well has the power, love, and fullness of God. I wanted to talk about a couple of things that I have taken note of that really made sense to life in general. So I decided to create a timeline of sorts to display what exactly happened at the beginning of the world and how it makes sense to life today.

Chapter 1: God creates the entire world. He sees that it is good but it is missing something... man
Chapter 2: God creates man, sees that he is good but is still lacking something. He then creates woman.
Chapter 3: So here's where it gets yucky and the most important piece of history vital to understanding life comes in. Man sins, the first ever sin recorded in the Bible. In verse 1 satan questions God's words to the woman, pushing her to question God. Then the next two verses are the scary stage of sin where she begins to contemplate and question. In verse 4 satan hurdles a lie at Eve telling her she will not die if she eats of the fruit. Which we all know very well that it is NOT true. Not even two verses later.... she commits the sin. But let me point out the sin was "desirable" and "delightful", making it true that sin always comes in a pretty package. Then in verse 8 (after Adam sins too) they are forced to hide because they become ashamed in front of the Lord. There you have it my friends, the process of sin. Pretty simple if you ask me. But there is still so much more to grab from this one passage about life. Verse 16 explains childbirth. Verse 18 explains why we have to take care of the ground, why things don't grow supernaturally like they first did. Nothing is anymore how it was planned to be. Animals have begun to eat each other... something that wasn't in the beginning. There was peace on earth. Now man has become a meat eater versus a vegetarian as Jesus planned. Our bodies and the needs of them all changed. Everything changed with one single sin and this is why life is the way it is today. Sin continued with every person that was recorded in the Bible and who wasn't.

I found this all so interesting and thought I would share it with you. It just gives so much wisdom and understanding into life and why it is this way.
Love Ayana <3