My call at this time

It's been months and it feels like decades since I last stepped out onto the missions field. Not that this is a first, after October 5th 2008 until April 2009 I was called home instead of elsewhere. Than the Lord took me to wonderful places including San Fran and Ireland. But it was hard way way hard to be home for those six months and with absolutely no connection with the missions field. That was a very difficult time in my journey and I wasn't in any shape to leave my home. This time it's different, I don't feel a strong call to Mexico anymore. No matter where I go or what I do San Francisco is always on the front of my mind. I can't explain the connection God gave me with that place. My prayer since August has been that the Lord would lead me back there before the end of the year. I spoke with my host family and had arrangements to stay there. All I needed was to catch the flight and take the leap of faith to do a missions trip all alone. But God has been closing that door and to be honest I really don't know where I am headed when it comes to this. My prayer at the moment is that the Lord will show me whether my calling is Mexico or Local Outreach for December. However, putting that all aside God has been showing me one thing in my two months away from the field........ this is my mission field and right now it's my family. It is to come alongside my parents and help them. To be the best witness I can be to my brothers and sisters. And most importantly to be fervently praying for my family. For the wayward and for strength for my parents to continue in the amazing job they are doing. And yes in answer to your last question..... God is doing amazing work in my life and breaking me, re-shaping me, and showing me his plan slowly. So for now this is where God wants me, at home ministering to my family and youth group. He is doing a great work in me and I know he is preparing me for something. So I trust that in his timing he will take me out of this current field and into another. Until than I praise him and flourish where he has planted me. Make the most of every moment he has given me and learn important things that I can use to minister to others. I share all of this with a heart of humility, as the Lord has humbled me greatly through it.
Love Ayana <3